It is difficult for Trump to share in the honor that every president since sports has bestowed on national champions. Football Teams. Basketball and Baseball Teams. Et cetera, et cetera.
It is difficult for Trump to find championship athletes to agree to be in the same room with him because not only is he just ignorant; mean; misogynist and rapey; he’s just disgusting and appears contagious. Champions — just average humans who respect themselves and pride in not living in squalor — go to lengths to avoid being in the same room with him on general sanitary grounds. But, champion athletes, you can’t field a team in pretty much any sport anymore without having a little bit of brown sugar in the mix.
Trump never figured that black and brown brothers and sisters would ever turn down the chance to be around the likes of his kind. How would the little roaches dare?”
But, dare, they did. So, this year was turning out to be a bust for the pretend king Donald. The college champion Villanova Wildcats laughed him off, attending a children’s piano recital at their college president’s mansion, instead. Oh wait. The Philadelphia champs showed up gleefully to pay respects to their hero in the Oval office.
Oh wait . . .
They visited the OBAMA White House. Trump hates Philadelphia. “Dirty-ass Pennsylvania losers,” he calls them, forgetting that Pennsylvania was an important state that Russia helped him steal to secure the coup. Oops.
Then, unfortunately, Philadelphia did it again. Poor trump. Old moron has Rodney Dangerfield luck. On the heels of those criminally black’d up Wildcat stealing honor from the “Greatening of America,” the Philadelphia Eagles NFL football champions stole the thunder from his all-trump-all-the-time Patriots. Of course those “coloreds” all pretty much found better things to do the day they were invited to kiss the idiot’s ring. Turns out most of them had to be mowing on their lawns and, oops, couldn’t make it.
How dare they?
Play king Donald couldn’t stand the embarrassment of throwing a party and having no one show up, so he uninvited them at the last minute and had a “give the military a good hummer” party, instead. Filled the rafters with a bunch of suckers who would be “on-the-clock required” to attend, LOL.
New York Times –> https://www.nytimes.com/2018/06/05/us/politics/trump-philadelphia-eagles-white-house-visit.html
All was looking bleak for the old boy. No one wanted to come, and now, both NBA teams playing for the championship this year preemptively told the Donald that if either of them won, well, Donald could respectfully go eat a bag of dicks — which is less about eating bags full of actual penises and more about effing off, the way the kids suggest it be done (link).
[note: by now, you know that the Golden State Warriors won the NBA Finals. You know that even if they weren’t disgusted by the idea of being around Trump because he’s an unapologetic, pathetic bigot, he’s a foreign enemy of every Californian. No golden state son or daughter; sister or brother; on any team or in any group would accept an invitation to be in the same building — let alone room with him while he is openly at war with California.]
So, no matter what could have happened with the NBA — short of a time warp to a championship team prior to Wilt Chamberlain opening the floodgates to “the darkening” of the sport, as trump calls it — no NBA team was ever going to suck up to a trump White House. Bummer, racist, old white man. No ball for you.
So, imagine the glee wrapped in a sloppy hamburger for trump when he learned that the whitest team in the whitest professional sport just won a wildly-historic championship right there in the town that trump carpetbag-coup’d into!
Congratulations, to the Washington Capitals!
Sports Illustrated –> https://www.si.com/nhl/2018/06/08/washington-capitals-win-stanley-cup-final-over-golden-knights
Trump was reportedly salivating at the chances that his naive base would be pleased that the Donald would finally be able to con some fellow bigots into his lair to show everyone just how other tough cookies pledge loyalty to papa trump.
“They all carry tiki torches, right? I mean, just look at them.” said trump. According to sources (rumored to be Kellyanne Conway).
Unfortunately for trump, the Capitals, too, declined his desperate invitation. As it turns out, six of the Capitals players are on either probation or parole and can not be around this White House even if they wanted to. Their probation / parole officers confirmed that it would be a violation of their continued release from prison to associate with felons or people under criminal investigation by the FBI.
There is a loophole that can still get them there. As the Washington Capitals coach, Barry Trotz explains:
“They can all go. Thing is, that douchebag Trump would just have to stay in one of his tacky hotels,” he said. Allegedly. “And, he’ll have to keep his vice president with him. And, that swampy cabinet; and his creepy family. Maybe Barack Obama would feel safe to fill in. I’d go.“